Musings on Parenting and Pregnancy from the Happiest Place on Earth

I survived my week at a Disney World resort for a work conference. I feel like I should get some kind of commemorative t-shirt. (Instead, I got a Mickey laptop sleeve - proof that even the most resistant will buckle over time.) Picked up some interesting parenting and pregnancy "key learnings" while there. What better place than the kid mecca itself? Here they are for your enjoyment.

1. The last person you'd expect wants to feel your stomach ... like the person checking your luggage. Ummm yah. That was interesting.
2. Am I the only one that doesn't have special "ugly shoes" for the airport or do people just have really bad taste in shoes? I'm telling you, everywhere I looked, I saw unfortunate-looking Tevas, big 'ol wedges, what can best be described as Lord of the Rings-inspired Birkenstocks, and rainbow socks with white tennies (which would have been ok if she were 6 .. not 60). I'm not saying you have to wear your Sunday best, but come on people! You have a responsibility to the people watchers!
3. Walking barefoot from the hammocks to your hotel room to avoid getting sand in your shoes sounds like a really good idea ... until you realize you're barefoot and pregnant.
4. You so totally can go to the kid-free pool if the kid hasn't popped out yet. I speak from experience. (And what a blessing ... it sounded like World War 3 every time I walked by "The Big Dig" where all the kiddos rule. Enjoying the peace and quiet while I can).
5. Pregnant women should NOT wear bikinis. I repeat - NOT. Just don't do it. I also speak from experience.
6. People on vacation think they're invisible. Take for example the shirtless men with no shame. (Admittedly, I'm guilty of this too, as I did bare the bulging belly for a good 20 minutes. Sorry, it won't happen again.)
7. Please - for the love of God - stay out of your children's closet. Silly parent, Crocs are for kids!
8. I'm beginning to experience the old adage for myself, "Moms should trust their instincts." Case in point, I came oh so close to spraying mosquito repellent all over me, when I paused long enough to read the label, Google "can you wear bug repellent when pregnant," and be advised by passersby not to "go there." My reward? Peace of mind and only two mosquito bites!
9. When in doubt, stretch it out. Although I'm well aware there's no special place in heaven for pregnant women who abstain from meds, I am slightly proud of the fact I haven't taken Tylenol yet. Mid-conference, I was DYING from back pain and thought about taking some, but all I had to do was stretch for five minutes and felt like a new woman! Labor will be, like, totally the same, right?
10. Want to go "back to school" shopping at Disneyland? Eat your heart out, crazy lady! But just remember ... that cute child-size Sponge Bob suitcase is full, and you will be personally hauling  back home that reversible goofy sweatshirt, glow in the dark Mickey ears, and Snow White princess outfit (unless your child is still wearing it for the 4th day in a row).
11. Vacationing at the happiest place on earth doesn't necessarily mean your children will be happy (expect intermittent wailing .... the. entire. trip.)
12. For the safety and comfort of all, please do not have children unless you plan to discipline them. And also? Just because you're at Disneyland doesn't mean you can check your parental duties at the door. Furthermore, do not name your kid Zuhlia (ZOO-LEE-UH). It sounds ridiculous when yelling at your wild toddler who has managed to make it from Terminal 2 to 10 in 2.5 seconds. 
13. But for every out-of-control child running around, there's two precious ones ready to steal your heart. I met a cutie on the shuttle from Downtown Disney back to the hotel that looked like she could be our little girl: my straight brown hair, Jared's freckles. She was so adorable it brought me to tears.
14. And on that sentimental note, my last and most important observation: as uncomfortable pregnancy and hectic parenting can be, never forget that our little monsters are gifts from God. Before boarding my plane back home, I saw a family approaching. Full of Disney gear, they'd clearly enjoyed a fun in the sun vacation. But there was a somberness to them all. They may have had fun, but they seemed distracted and subdued. And then I noticed - one of the children - about 5 years old - had a shaved head and a "Make A Wish" t-shirt on. This child's much-anticipated last wish - a dream vacation at Disney World - was coming to an end. I was immediately brought to tears, like I am now writing this post. Kids are blessings through and through and it's incredibly unfair our little ones all too often face life-threatening diseases. It's frustrating that we live in a world where children suffer, but encouraging that we also live in a world where there are organizations that want to help. To support "Make a Wish" visit wish.org.